It has taken me years to realize that by comparing myself to others, I was actually doing two things: trying to figure out how good I actually was and trying to make myself feel better.

Spoiler: comparison is a terrible way to make yourself feel better.

This may seem fundamental, like telling a child to not touch a hot pan, but the funny thing about truth is that no matter how simple or “common sense” an idea – often does not translate into actions that align with it.

Instead of acting in alignment with truth we act in alignment with our beliefs.

Identifying your personal motivation, what drives you to compare, will equip you with the information needed to take action to stop the destructive spiral.  

However, because pride is often a root cause of comparison, I think a common motivator of comparison is in pursuit of finding individual worth or value. This was a strong personal motivator for me.

Comparison serves as a benchmark to measure ourselves against others.

But I’ve got a bit of truth to powerfully light up the dark shadow of that false belief:

Your value has nothing to do with the things you have.

Your value has nothing to do with the things you don’t have.

Your value has nothing to do with the family you were born into.

Your value has nothing to do with the shoes on your feet.

Your value has nothing to do with the food in your fridge.

Your value has nothing to do with the job you work.

Your value has nothing to do with the color of your skin.

Your value has nothing to do with the number of likes on your post.

Your value has nothing to do with the amount of influence you have.

Your value has nothing to do with the way others view you.

Your value has nothing to do with the way you look.

For as many times as these truths are listed, I am without doubt that you could use to hear them many more times.

Please take these truths, remember them, write them on your mirror, reflect on them daily, put it as your phone lock screen and text one of these to your friend.

I deeply wish I could look into your eyes and audibly deliver these truths to you. Hearing these truths from people around you is so powerful. To witness this first hand, just try sharing these truths with any of your friends the next opportunity you get.

What other factors motivate you to compare? I encourage you to do some introspection, it’s a question worth pursuing on your own.