Walk into a grocery store.

Proclaim “Bonjour” in a way that will surely identify you as a foreigner, unintentionally, of course.

Get some meat—prosciutto, bologna, salami.

Get some cheese, freshly cut from the deli; you’re in France, after all.

Get a fresh loaf of bread.

Grab an apple and a banana on your way out.

Transform into Remy from Ratatouille, taking bites of each element.